By Stefanie Abderhalden
Have you ever thought: I’d love to bring my kids to church service but they’d never sit still or they’d make too much noise and we’d be embarrassed? For those who have had those thoughts, I’m hoping to offer a new perspective on bringing kids to worship with hopes that more families can feel comfortable worshiping together at Grace.
My husband Erik and I have two young daughters, Lorelai (six) and Eliza (one). Our family typically attends the 8:00 service and during the 9:15 hour our oldest attends Sunday School while the adults attend our faith formation class.
Do we make it to service every Sunday morning? Absolutely not. Some days it’s too much of a struggle to get two kids out of the house and we just come for the Sunday School hour. But we have made it a priority since our daughters were babies to attend worship together. It’s part of our values as Christians that we worship together as often as we can.
I want to acknowledge that all families and kids are different. Some parents may be thinking, I look forward to Sunday School each week so I can go to service or adult faith formation and have a break from my kids! Others may worry about how their child would do in service and if it would be a manageable situation. These are all valid points and concerns. Each family must do what is right for them.
Here are my top five thoughts on bringing kids to church.
Worship is Part of Being a Christian. When our daughters attend church, they learn worship traditions, hear hymns, learn the Apostle’s Creed and the Lord’s Prayer, and partake in weekly Communion. These practices are so important to our faith they are done every week. Without participating, kids won't carry on these traditions. Sunday School helps kids grow in faith, but service is also an important way to worship God.
Part of the Body of Christ. Worship is an intergenerational experience. On Sundays, our girls worship with people of all ages and backgrounds. In daily life, children rarely engage in activities with all generations, as school, sports, and other activities are kid-focused with adults leading. In worship, we all participate together as the Body of Christ.
Children can be Leaders. An awesome thing about attending worship at Grace is that kids and families can be involved. Lorelai helps Erik usher, and we've been greeters. During Advent, our family reads the liturgy and lights the candles. Lorelai also sings in the Cherub Choir. Worship includes kids as helpers, which adults love, and kids feel needed. It's a win-win. Ask any minister how your family can get involved; they'll find a place for you.
Jesus wants them there! One of my favorite Bible stories is about Jesus and the children in Matthew 19. People bring children to Jesus, and the disciples try to send them away. Jesus intervenes, saying, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” Jesus never intended for kids to be excluded from worship. I believe He’d love the babies babbling and the commotion of children.
Progress, not perfection. If your kids are like ours, they can be unpredictable. Some weeks they sit nicely, but most weeks it's tougher! My husband and I see worship as a learning process for our girls. Just like you wouldn't expect a child to finish a 5k on their first day running, we set low expectations for our daughter Lorelai when she was young. We'd aim to get through the first choir song or scripture reading, and if she got antsy, one of us would take her to the back or outside. Preparing her for service helped; we'd discuss what to expect and how she could participate. Often, she chose a special sticker book to work on during the sermon.
Grace makes it easy to attend with kids. In the back of the sanctuary, you'll find bags with coloring and quiet toys. If they get too antsy, there's an area with a mat, rocking chair, and toys where you can still hear the service. The nearby Gathering Space also has a play area and bathrooms.
If you haven't before, let this be a nudge to bring your kids to worship. Attend the 8:00 service and then go to the faith formation hour. Adults can volunteer in Sunday School or attend an adult class. If 8:00 is too early, attend the 10:30 service after the faith formation hour. If you're a 9G participant, consider bringing your children to worship occasionally, or they can attend 9G when Sunday School is on break. Our congregation welcomes families and children, and there is a place for you in worship at Grace.
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